a Blind wife and a deaf husband.
32. Q: During Marriage ceremony why is the
bridegroom made to sit on the horse? A: He is given his last chance to
31. Man: Is there any way for long life?
Doctor: Get married. Man: Will it help?
Doctor: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
30. A person who surrenders when he’s WRONG,
A person, who SURRENDERS when not SURE,
A person who surrenders even if he’s RIGHT,
is a HUSBAND!
29. One day a man inserted
and advertisement’ in the
local classifieds: “Wife wanted”. Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”
28. After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife,
you know, I was a fool when I married you.
She replied, Yes dear, I know
but I was in love and didn’t notice.
27. “When a man holds a woman hands?”When a man holds a woman’s hand
before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense
26.It’s funny when people discuss
LOVE MARRIAGE vs. ARRANGED.It’s like asking someone,
if suicide is better or being murdered
25. Telling a lie is
Fault 4 a little boy
an Art 4 a lover
an Accomplishment 4 a bachelor
and a Matter of survival 4 a married man
24. Only true friends stand by u
during bad times.
I will attend ur wedding.
23.The Equation of Marriage: 7 Glance = 1 Smile 7 Smile = 1 Meeting 7 Meeting = 1 Kiss 7 Kisses = 1 Proposal 7 Proposal = 1 Marriage – And that 1 marriage has 77777+ problems. So beware of glance!
22. First marriage is the triumph of
imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the
triumph of hope over experience
21. Why do we all marry?
Because romance is not
the only element of life.
We should also know horror,
terror, suspense, irony,
stupidity & tragedy of LIFE.
20. Marriage is like going to
a restaurant your choice
from the menu,
then look at neighboring
table n wish you’d ordered that…
19. What a married man says after years of marriage:- My marriage is made of Trust & Understanding, she doesn’t Trust me & I don’t Understand her.
18. Marriage is not a word. It’s a sentence….(a life sentence!).
17. Marriage is a 3-ring circus – engagement ring, wedding ring and Suffering.
24.A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes.
23.A woman was telling her friend , “It was I who made my husband a millionaire.”And what was he before you married him?” asked the friend.
The woman replied, ” A multi-millionaire”.
22. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
21. Husband to wife: Why do you keep reading our marriage licence?
Wife to Husband: I’m looking for a loophole
20. Men are like chocolate bars…. sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
19. A little kid asks his Dad, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?”
“No idea,” replied the Father, “I’m still paying for it…”
18. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married – now he is going through Hell!!!
17.Q: Why do brides wear white?
A: To blend in with everything else in the kitchen.
16.One day a man inserted an ‘advert’ in the local classifieds: “Wife wanted”.
Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”
15.What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? -
Well, it’s the same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving
14.Marriage – an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor’s Degree and the woman gets her Masters.
13. After a lengthy quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.”
The husband replied: “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice it.”
12.A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. -
11.Marriage changes passion … suddenly you’re in bed with a relative
10.Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
9.Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.
8. A husband’s last words should always be ‘OK buy it’.
7. They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.
6. There’s only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I’ll get married again.
5. The most dangerous food a man can eat is wedding cake .
4.After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together..
3. The trouble with some woman is that they get all excited about nothing, and then marry him
2. I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late.
1.I never married because I have three pets at home that answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.